Target Practice
by Emilamoo
Summary: Jane is struggling in his target practice. Lisbon steps in to help him, and ends up in a situation she would've never imagined. Rated for language, mostly.


**A/N: HEY-LLO everybody, I'm back!!! Finally! It feels like it's been so long! I've been really busy, but I've managed to write two one-shots and 15 chapters of a very long fanfic. However, I am putting a LONG hold on Choices and Roses because I'm really busy. I've got a HUGE project due on the 21****st****, and I have tennis and volleyball practice after school, and I have to write articles for my school newspaper, and I have to do other stuff for the yearbook committee. Not to mention my Algebra teacher gives me homework every night. So as you can tell, I'm very busy. But I will always have time for Jisbon! **

**Loved the Red Badge episode, so much Jisbon! It's still my favorite. I can't wait for this week's episode… Jane in a tux and Lisbon looking stunning in a dress! Yay! And then he puts the diamond tiara on her head… eep!**

**There was a poll on my profile, but I'm not surprised that no one's visited it lately because I've been AWOL. But two people did vote on it, and this fic one. So hear you go! I'll post the other one later. **

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**Disclaimer: I had a Mentalist-themed birthday party last night with a Red John cake and lots of red and black balloons with pictures of The Mentalist hanging on the ribbons… does that count? No? Well, I guess I still don't own it then.**

**Target Practice**

_Bam._

"Crap!"

_Bam._

"Damn!"

_Bam._

"Shit!"

_Bam._

"Arguh!"

_Bam._

"What the hell?!"

_Bam._

"Stop grinning at me, you stupid little clown!"

_Bam._

"Nyegh!"

Patrick Jane stared at the large, life-size cut out of a clown with seven sections. It was a huge version of darts, with the clown as the board and Jane's gun as the darts. He was in target practice, one for the many training he'd have to complete to be able to go out on the field like his boss Teresa Lisbon and co-workers Wayne Rigsby, Kimball Cho, and Grace Van Pelt.

So far, however, it didn't look like he'd be getting there anytime soon. He hadn't been able to shoot any part of the clown's body, only the air around it. Little did he know that he had an observer...

Senior Agent Teresa Lisbon watched her consultant continue to shoot and miss, very amused. She loved how he got all mad when he missed, which was pretty much all the time.

"AW, _COME ON!_"

Jane put down his gun, sat down cross-legged on the floor, and cradled his head in his hands in frustration.

Lisbon felt sympathetic by then and decided to help him. She took a pair of protective goggles and ear phones before quietly entering the enclosed area.

"Having troubles?" she asked quietly, a ghost of a smile playing on her lips.

He looked up at the sound of her voice and smiled slightly. "Yeah. My gun hates me." He laughed bitterly. "Maybe it's not even worth the effort. Maybe I'm just meant to be the brains, and you to be the brawn."

"Hey," Lisbon said, placing her hand on his shoulder affectionately and squeezing lightly. "Don't give up. You're not going to succeed at everything right away." When he remained silent, she sighed. "Come on, get up. I'm gonna help you."

He smiled at her again and stood up.

"Stand in your position," she ordered.

He took his stand and held up his gun.

"_That's _how you take your stand?" she asked in disbelief.

"Well...yeah," Jane told her, shrugging.

She snorted. "Well there's your first problem. You're standing way off and you're not even holding the gun right."

"Well, show me, Oh Great One."

"Gimme your gun."

He handed it over and watched her take her position.

"Square up, feet apart but not too apart, shoulders back and relaxed, breaths steady, left hand wrapped tightly around the handle, right hand by trigger, thumb braced on the back of the handle, pointer finger brushing and resting slightly on the trigger, eyes on target, and shoot."

_Bam!_

Jane watched in amazement as a bullet whizzed and went clean through the clown's smallest section, the heart.

"See? Now come over here and do it."

Jane walked over to her, tried to pose in the same pose, and fired. The bullet barely grazed the shoulder of the clown.

"Okay, this isn't working."

Lisbon walked over to Jane and stood very close behind him. Even though she was much shorter than him, she still managed to fix his posture.

"Bring your feet in closer, Jane. You're not straddling a bloody bike! And relax your shoulders."

She put her hands on his shoulders and applied light pressure. He relaxed under her touch.

"You can bend your elbows a little, you know. Your arms don't have to be perfectly straight and stiff."

She stepped even closer to him, running her hands down his shoulders and onto his buff arms. She gently made his elbows bend a little.

He could feel her pressed up against his back, her warm breath falling onto the back of his neck. His heart was racing. He had never been this close to Lisbon, ever, and her touch was electrifying. Not to mention addictive.

"And relax your hands. You're not squeezing a toothpaste tube!" she told him with a little laugh.

But Jane was barely listening. The only thing he was aware of was Lisbon's small, soft hands sliding down his biceps and forearms. Her slender fingers wrapping around his. Her silky, dark hair brushing against his neck.

_Bam!_

"Wah-ah!" Jane called out in surprise, not prepared for the bullet that whizzed out.

He stumbled back and fell, bringing Lisbon with him.

"Agh," she gasped, falling on top of him.

His arm fell around her waist and he looked up at her.

Lisbon looked down at him, her heart starting to beat faster. He was going to kiss her. Patrick Jane- the world's most unavailable man- was going to kiss her! Who knew how many times she had fantasized about this moment?

He leaned in closer.

Their lips were only a breath away when Lisbon whispered, "We should probably get up."

She climbed up off him and turned away, blushing shamefully. She looked at the clown to avoid looking him in the eyes.

"Hey, you hit his-" she started to say.

"Lisbon," Jane interrupted her.

"-neck. Not bad. He'd-"

"Lisbon."

"-probably be dead now. If-"

"Lisbon."

"-he was real. Which, he's-"

Her words were cut off by Jane's lips pressing against her in a fiery yet brief kiss.

"-so obviously not," she mangaged to whisper with what little breath she had left.

"_Lisbon!_" She shut her mouth. "Stop talking! The only way I want you to move your lips is against mine," he told her.

"Okay," she whispered, closing her eyes.

She would allow him- and her- this moment. She was too far in to back out now, not to mention she didn't want to. He kissed her with passion, and she responded. Her hands moved from his shoulders to his muscular chest.

He pulled her a bit closer before cupping her face with both of his hands and slowly running his right hand through her soft hair. Her own hands moved to tangle in his golden curls, and she could feel Jane's hands on her back.

Slowly, he pushed her back until she was against the wall. His tongue pushed back her lips and mingled with hers.

Lisbon suddenly worried about getting caught. She eventually thought it was worth it. There's was no way she'd do anything to stop this. She wanted it- wanted him, wanted his love- too much to care.

Their kissing eventually slowed down to a slow, steady movement. And at that moment, Lisbon knew she was undeniably falling for him.

They broke apart, both smiling.

"Can I take you to dinner?" he asked her.

"I don't know..." she said uncertainly.

"Come on. Please?" he asked with his puppy-do face.

Lisbon smiled. "Tell you what. You shoot any one of the three bullets into the clown's heart and I'll let you take me to dinner."

Jane smiled eagerly. "Really?"

She nodded. "Really."

"Okay."

He took his gun and fired three shots.

Lisbon gaped at the three holes in the clown's heart. Then, the realizations of what just happened set in and she gasped.

"You knew how to shoot this whole time, didn't you?"

Jane just laughed in response.

"Oh, wow. I can't believe I was so stupid! I shouldn't known..."

"I'm sorry," he told her, laughing. "I couldn't resist."

"Okay, but you'll have to make it up to me," she told him, a mischievous smile forming on her lips.

Jane smiled and raised an eyebrow. "Oh yeah? And how will I do that?"

Lisbon moved in close to him and trailed her hand up and down his chest. "By keeping me company at my house after you take me to dinner, and by making me breakfast the next morning," she proposed in a murmur seductively.

Jane smiled and wrapped his arms around her waist, pulling her close to him. "I think I can do that," he whispered.

Then, he leaned in for another mind-blowing kiss, one of- no doubt- many to come.

**Yes, I know it's cheesy. But in my defense, I wrote this back in August so... yeah. I've become more deep and thoughtful and passionate and involved and... better, I guess, in my writing now. You'll be able to tell when I start posting my latest story. Y'all should give it a chance, even though you might think it's stupid. But Jane'll be immortal, and Lisbon... won't be. Oh, and they'll all be in high school.**

**It was my 14th birthday on Wednesday. Does anyone wanna write me a fanfic? Ha ha. Just kidding. Not really. I'm hopeful! :? It would have to be a Jisbon one, of course. Hee hee. I'm obsessed. XD**

**If you don't wanna write me a fic, a review would suffice just fine. ;)**


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